I really can't believe that today its been 8 weeks since I met my daughters and said goodbye to them. I can't believe how abnormal I feel in my own skin these days. I forget things that I never usually would forget. My mind is elsewhere. My mind wanders all day, thinking about the girls and wondering what life would be like with them here. But I've learned a lot of things in the past 8 weeks, about myself, my husband, life in general, and the people surrounding me.
Life is not fair.
People sometimes don't understand how hard this is.
People sometimes don't know what to say and its better when they don't say anything at all.
There are some great people in our lives that are really supportive.
Sometimes life makes you grow up way too fast, even if you don't want to.
I am forever changed by this experience.
And even though I know how scary being pregnant again will be, I know how badly we want to be parents. I know how great a father my husband will be. I see him with his niece and nephews and it breaks my heart. Not in a bad way. But a great way. He is wonderful with them. And one day, we will have more children, not just Madelyn and Olivia, our angels in heaven.
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God Bless you both and your girls.
ReplyDeleteJennifer, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with this blog. It is impossible for any of us to know how you feel or what you are thinking, but being able to read your thoughts is actually a comfort to your friends. It is hard to know what to say, but please know that you are in our hearts and our thoughts. It will be scary to be pregnant again, but you and David are amazing parents and will be blessed with more children. The girls will always be with you and they know that you both love them. Thanks so much - Cheryl
ReplyDeletethinking of you and your family Jen {{hugs}}. praying that the days get easier to cope and that you continue to be surrounded by great family and friends who love and support you.
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