I remember when dave and I went to my company christmas party and he requested our wedding song be played because it was the weekend of our 1 year anniversary. I remember how happy he was after we got done dancing because he announced to my co workers that he had just danced with his babies for the first time. That breaks my heart...
My heart is broken into a million pieces and the only thing I want are my babies to put it back together. Not just any babies. My baby girls, Madelyn and Olivia. I want to hold them and watch them grow up. I want to see them smile at me and talk to me and crawl and walk and accomplish things in life. But I can't and that is why my heart is broken.
I am so angry that I will never get to experience these things with my baby girls. I know that in the future I will have more babies, but I want my twin baby girls, Madelyn and Olivia, and that is why I am heartbroken.
You will be whole again, I promise. It will take a long time, but you will. My prayers are with you and your family who are so heartbroken.
ReplyDeletejen,
ReplyDeletethey say time heals the pain. 2 yrs later i still think of my 2 lil guys, but its gotten easier to start to live life to the fullest again.
please remember, you are mother!! whether your children are earthbound or heavenly sent, you will always be their mother. although they are not physically with you, they are spiritually always there. they will be with your through all the good and bad times to come. and u better believe they will be celebrating mothers/fathers day this year and years to come. although bitter sweet of a day, you are still a proud parent to twin angels. {{hugs}}
jen, i really don't know what to say. the weight of this should be too heavy to bare, but somehow you go on. i know that God does not cause these horrible things to happen, but i do know that He will use them. just by getting up every morning and starting your day you are such an inspiration. even this blog in some way or another will probably help someone who needs it one day. i'm sure you will be told a thousand times how strong you are for getting through this. and you are. but i also know you would trade anything to have those little girls here. one day you WILL be with them again. i pray for you always. xxo
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